MERRY CHRISTMAS

Emo and his handlers would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone in the world a Merry Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate). Peace!

WIDE ASLEEP

WIDE ASLEEP is being released across the country shortly but the real question is "IS THIS REALLY AN EMO MOVIE?"  Normally, the producer or director named ALAN SMITHEE is code for "this movie stinks".  How could Emo be associated with something so bad?  Stay tuned!!!

Emo is in da House

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If you can't get to Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), NY to visit Emo, pick up a copy of ARCHITECTURAL DIJEST magazine to see his home.  Nested on 1/3 exquisitely landscaped acres outside Rochester, the house is home to Emo and his handlers.  The house has been designed to retain the charm of an '80 split while boasting amenities such as running water, see-thru windows and flush toilets.  The kitchen has it's own refrigeration unit as well as a gas flame cooking device.  Work continues at a slow pace to refine and maintain the stately level befitting a star of his stature.  On sale now wherever fine magazines are sold.

Watch out for - CATATONIA

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Just in time for Halloween!  This looks pretty scary!  Emo usually come out with an appropriate move for Halloween and this looks like one of his best. With an all-star cast (and an Emo favorite, Troy McClure) we can't wait!!!  Better get in line early for tickets to see this one! 

NEW!!! "The Secret" is out (or will be soon)!

Looks like Harry Potter will have some competition this fall!  THE SECRET OF THE CAT'S EYE has been the most anticipated film of the year, and a big event in Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), NY, where it will premiere.  Emo is expected to be on hand if his handlers can wake him in time.  Then, a long vacation is planned for Emo.  His plans include sleeping by the fireplace and eating lots of french fries.  But don't worry, the word on the street is that there are at least 2 more films to be released after SECRET.  Stay tuned!

He's baaaaack!

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Emo returns from a long nap with a new movie coming to select theaters this month.  It's WHERE THE WILD THINGS HIDE and he's very excited about it.  As usual, details about this project have been kept under wraps, so not much information to pass on until reviewers get a chance to see it.  So if you happen to be in an area where there is a select theater, be sure to catch it.  Anything Emo is an event!  Stay tuned!

Dr. Who?

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Just in time to chase away the "back to school" blues, the first theatrical move of Doctor Who has Emo as his co-star.  Or is that co-pilot?  Dr. Who is the longest running science fiction show in the world and has never been more popular.  The program depicts the adventures of a mysterious and eccentric humanoid alien known as the Doctor who travels through time and space in his spacecraft, the TARDIS (an acronym for Time And Relative Dimensions In Space), which normally appears from the exterior to be a blue 1960s British police call box.  It is much bigger on the inside that on the outside. (Don't ask).  See it only in theaters, and don't forget your sonic screwdrivers!!!

New this fall...

ONEOWNER has announced that the new CLAW & ORDER CC will air this fall.  Emo is not much of a TV guy, but he does like a good mystery once and a while.  Word has it he will make a guest appearance this season.  We'll keep you posted.   Stay tuned!!!

Bwana Emo in the Land of the Lost Litter

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Every summer there is a movie that stands above the rest and becomes an instant classic.  "Bwana Emo in the Land of the Lost Litter" is that movie this year.  The New York Times said "This is what summer movies are all about".  Entertainment Weakly said "The movie Leonardo DiCaprio wished he made instead of that other one."  Roger Ebert said "Finally, a film worthy of my praise."  Webster Herald said "SWELL!!!". And it's in WEBSTERVISION too!!!

Download Emo iPad Wallpaper

Get the new Emo iPad wallpaper, FREE!!!  Click on the comment below and register to get your wallpaper autographed by Emo himself!!! 

Must be 12 or over to register.  This offer not available in states north of the 49th parallel, due to former governor restrictions.  Sorry.

PARANORMAL CAPTIVITY - Coming soon!

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From Emo's High School Yearbook?!?

EMO

Football, 9; Basketball, 10; Bowling, 11; Golf, 12; National Honor Society, 9, 10, 11, 12; Band, 9, 10, 11, 12; Glee Club, 9, 10, 11, 12; Homecoming King; Varsity Club President, 10, 11, 12; Student Council, 9, 10, 11, 12; Student Council President; Voted "Most Likely to Succeed"; National Feline Institute Cat of the Year; Likes soft chairs, fish, whipped cream, toys that look like carrots; Dislikes loud noises, sudden movement, doorbells;  Favorite TV show, "Dog, the Bounty Hunter";  Favorite movie, "The Adventures of Milo and Otis";  Favorite Broadway Play, "Cats";  Favorite Ice Cream, Ben & Jerry's  "Phish Food" and "Whirled Peace".

WARP! Coming Soon!!!

ONEOWNER hasn't said much about this but we do know it was filmed entirely in Webster (Where life is Worth Living), NY.  Fortunately, Webster looks a lot like River Falls in the winter, so it could be pretty convincing.  Is it Emo's life story?  Stay tuned!

The Most Anticipated Movie of the Decade (if not the day)!

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Finally, after years of waiting, the movie you have been waiting for is just around the corner.  STARGAZE will be in theaters this July!  Peter Jackson proclaimed this to be the best movie of the year - and HE HASN'T EVEN SEEN IT!!!  It's the movie he always wanted to make!  Well, now he doesn't have to.  Stay tuned for more high praise.

Emo makes the cover of American Art!!!

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WOW!!!  American Art is probably the most prestigious magazine in the world (next to Cat Fancy)!!!  This was shot at the ONEOWNER studios in Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), NY last year and has had the art world buzzing!!!  Emo has received offers of up to $6.47 for each copy.  But this beautiful COLOR print can be yours for free!  You read that right - FREE!!!  Leave a comment below and one lucky fan will win!!! But wait, there's more!!!  The lucky winner will also have the print autographed by Emo himself!!!  Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, act now!!! 

CREATURE Feature - new from Emo

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CREATURES from the BLUE LAGOON opens this week around the country at most theaters equipped to show WEBSTERVISION.  If there isn't one near you, wait one week and the rest of the country will see the non-WEBSTERVISION version.  This movie has the critics raving!  We find our hero shipwrecked on a desert island frozen in time, surrounded by prehistoric creatures without his blanky!  And no treats!  He soon realizes he may be thousands of miles from the nearest place that serves french fries!  How can he be saved???!!! Did we mention there are NO TREATS?!!!

Leave a Comment is now activated!

Finally.  Emo has promised to read as many comments left by his fans as his waking hours permit.  He might even answer some of your questions!  So, go ahead, leave a comment!  Please!!

Emo's first Spanish movie is on the way!

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In any language, Emo movies are very entertaining. This one is full of action, adventure, romance, action, music, action and action! And there is plenty of ACTION too! Filmed entirely on location in Mexico and Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), NY, this action packed adventure finds the Cat Bandit on the run after being double crossed by the Federales! They didn't realize that they messed with the wrong cat!! We don't want to give too much away, but there is plenty of action! Coming to a theater near you soon. Stay tuned!

GLITTER LITTER - New from Emo

Emo has received so many request to share his choice of litter that he has decided to market his own brand and not depend on other manufacturers. This revolutionary product is so advanced that the other litters are "left in the dust". The "diamond" crystals absorb odors and make the box attractive to cats. Cats love it so much that even "naughty" and "problem" cats run to this box. Does it cost more than other brand? Of course! But a portion of profits go to one of Emo's favorite charities, GRASP, which fosters homeless cats of all ages. And a box of GLITTER LITTER is so attractive, you may be tempted to keep it where everyone can see it! However, it's usually best to give the cat some privacy, trust us! Look for it at better pet stores everywhere.

CASABLANCA II coming soon

You read that right! 68 years in the making (more or less), ONEOWNER has made the movie no one has dared to make. It's taken a long time to get all the elements for this movie to come together but, at last, it's here. It's a sweeping tale of love, betrayal, revenge, murder, more revenge, some music and, finally, redemption. Reviews have been very positive so far. The New Yorker - "...even better than the first one!", Time magazine - "... a sweeping tale of love, betrayal, revenge, murder, more revenge, some music and, finally, redemption", Entertainment Weakly - "Black is Back!", Webster (Where Life is Worth Living) Herald - "...SWELL!!!".

So don't miss this one boys and girls! It's not too early in the year to start picking Oscar favorites. Stay tuned.

Crash of the Titans - a movie you shouldn't miss!

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This seems very similar to another movie in theaters now called CLASH OF THE TITANS. The big difference between that movie and Emo's is that this one is historically accurate and based on the real Perseus (a cat)! And this one is in WEBSTERVISION!! If that's not enough to make you want to go out and buy a ticket, here's one more thing - CRASH OF THE TITANS is FREE!!! Yes, that's right. The first 10,000 tickets will be given away absolutely free. We'll keep you informed when it's released so you can wait in line with the other 9,999 fans!!! Stay tuned!

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Emo's latest poster for the film ELEMENT 119 shows him perched on his Hoverpad (his invention) with his thinking cap on. Although it seems fantastic that a cat can discover an element (and name it after himself!) we have to remember that this is no ordinary cat. Emo was named INVENTOR of the YEAR (2005) by Popular Science for his Flux Capacitor, a device many scientist believe essential for time travel and trash disposal.

In addition to Emo, the cast features James Dyson, inventor of the ball, making his acting debut. Mr. Dyson replaces Mickey Rourke, who dropped out of the production due to a "scheduling conflict". Yeah, right! Stay tuned!!!

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It's a little known fact that Emo was behind bars for a long time. Yes, that's right. He was caught stealing day old french fries out of a dumpster behind a McDonald's in River Falls, WI. Now his story can be told. A true story of bad luck, regret and redemption. Wait, it's a story of bad luck, regret, then good luck and then redemption. But not a lot of bad luck. And not so much regret. But a true story nonetheless. Rumor has it that this story is so good that it may be make into a book! Also, Corey Barker may do a tutorial on the making of the poster on www.planetphotoshop.com. Life is so SWEET! For Emo, that is. Stay tuned!

Furious

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Sandra Bullock is HOT! We're, of course, talking about her career. Her Academy Award (and Razzie) win was the highlight of one of her best years as an actress. We've loved all her films, with the possible exception of "Speed 2: Cruise Control". She has finally teamed with Emo for the latest "Furious". Since not much is know about this project, there is a lot of speculation about the plot. Insiders say it is not about Sandy's "personal problem" but about the fur industry. Good guess. That's Emo's fur on the poster! Stay tuned!

Terror Code 303 Premiers

Webster has finally premiered Emo's Terror Code 303, a film that has spent over a year in the vault. This problem plagued production has just passed Emo's requirements for a release. Rumor has it that he has taken over final editing and shot additional scenes to get it theater worthy. This is the first big sci-fi pic this year and advanced screenings have been very positive. Emo decided to take a chance on action co-stars that, to be kind, haven't had a hit in a very long time. But that's the kind of guy he is. He loved (some of) their movies, it's only fair to give a second chance to such amazing talent. If you're in Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), check it out. If not, what are you waiting for, housing here is very affordable. MOVE! Stay tuned.

Is this or is this not - Emo?

Well, the answer is yes. And no. It seems that the producers pieced this together from outtakes of other Emo films. That's why we see the black bar across his eyes, an annoyance that occurs through the entire 3 minutes and 13 seconds of Emo footage. Very, very low budget. But guess what - it's pretty good! One reviewer says "... this is the movie Hitchcock would have made if he lived to be 110 years old". So go check it out. It's in limited release now but it'll be on DVD next month. Stay tuned!

Emo @ Home

Yes, that's Emo, relaxing on the set of his latest film (which happens to be his back yard) in Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), NY. Because Emo doesn't like to travel very much, most of the films are make in his home, where he spends over 102% of his time. That's excluding those annoying visits to Clip'n'Cuddle and the vet, where he will be headed for his annual check-up very shortly. Though he doesn't enjoy these outings (especially in Webster winter weather), he is very well behaved and has only attacked one groomer on one occasion. We won't get too far into it but, she had it coming, according to an Emo rep.

SpongeBob makes a rare appearance Webster

Webster (Where Life is Worth Living) declared a snow day today, so what do you do when life gives you snow? Make snowmen, or in this case, a snow SpongeBob. He must be having a good time, because he's smiling a mile wide!

BearcaT

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Filmed this winter in Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), Bearcat tells the story of a lost cat struggling to stay alive in the dead of winter on the streets of in upstate New York. Contrary to popular belief, cats and bears have much in common; they both are covered in fur, both eat quite a lot of fish (for their size) and they both like to sleep. However, while cats like to keep warm (especially Emo), polar bears love the cold weather. Solution? ACTING!!! Early review say this is one of the best Emo movies EVER!!! Stay tuned!

WolfCat? Why not?

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That's Emo on the poster for the new WOLFCAT movie released today. Filmed entirely in Webster (Where Life is Worth Living), NY where, back in 1932, the actual Wolfman appeared for the first time in the US, only in black and white. But the legend of the WOLFCAT goes way back in eastern European history. Some story tellers say that during the full moon, the cat changes into a wolf and terrorizes the countryside. Others say that the wolf turns into a cat and terrorizes the countryside. Either way, there's plenty of terror to go around. Stay tuned!!!

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Time travel has always intrigued movie goers and this one from Emo will finally take down that "Avatar" movie at the box office. Unlike most time travel stories, this one makes sense. We know that 20 minutes to a cat is everything. They sleep for 20 minutes, eat for 20 minutes, look out the back window for 20 minutes, and when mom and dad go to work, they're back in 20 minutes. They can destroy a ball of yarn or eat an entire stick of pepperoni in twenty minutes. Even a movie like "Australia" (which seemed like about 20 hours to most people) is 20 minutes to a cat. So is the movie "20 minutes" only 20 minutes long? Well, yes, to a cat! Stay tuned!!!

I'll be Bach!?

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The first ARTSHOUSE production of the year hits theaters this week. It's the story of German composer J. S. Bach and is the most ambitious role for Emo. Since there are not a lot of photographs of Bach available, it's conceivable that he looks like Emo. The audience should suspend disbelief while watching this film. But you'll get caught up in the action since the script was originally written by Sylvester Stallone, who dropped out at the last minute. This film opens in select theaters, meaning only those that are not in Multiplexes and sell salads instead of popcorn.

Emo's Entertainment Weakly Cover Shot

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Emo's on the cover of this upcoming Entertainment Weakly magazine with his friend, Lilly. Reports of these two getting together for another film are burning up the internet these days. Get all the information here, including a chat with James Cameron & Emo for a proposed Avatar sequel. One question for Cameron: If you make a movie every 10 years, won't Emo be too old to play the hero? Cameron says "Haven't you seen Avartar yet? Don't you know what we can do to actors today with CGI?" I guess we'll have to wait and see. Pick up your magazine today and stay tuned!

By the way, we saw Avatar and it's worth the extra dime to see it in 3D!!!

Emo DVDs!!!

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Emo fans rejoice! After months of waiting, the first two DVDs from ONEOWNER and Emo hit the stores this Tuesday. Emo loves trains, so it's logical that these are his train movies. There has only been one other Emo movie to make it to DVD, "Attack of the 50 Foot Cat" (his first). Why such a long wait? Who knows? We promise to get to the bottom of this, but for now, stay tuned!!!

Burning Love

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If you've ever been to River Falls, Wisconsin in early February you know how cold it can be. Here's something to warm you up. "Burning Love" is about to be released and is making it's premiere in River Falls this month. Oneowner claims this is a true story "with license". Whatever! Stay tuned!!!